Fourteen Weeks and the End of Maternity Leave

Fourteen weeks of snuggles and sleepless nights.
Fourteen weeks of learning to be a family of four.
Fourteen weeks of tears - from both of us.
Fourteen weeks of worries for a new babe.
Fourteen weeks of watching her explore her world.
Fourteen weeks of love growing more than I thought possible.
Fourteen weeks of moments I will savor.

I’m lucky to get fourteen weeks of just Tessa and Momma time.  So lucky that I feel guilty about it.  (Thanks to a society that forces moms to work too soon and then guilts them into going back too soon.)  I even have another week home with Mila for Spring Break, and heck, who knows, maybe another week or two after that.  But, today is an end. An end of my official leave.

I’m ready to go back to work and I’m sad to go back to work.  I want to go back and see my students. And I want to stay home and watch my girl grow and learn new things every day. The momma-teacher heart struggle is real.

So while this sleeping babe lays in my arms, I’m going to choose to savor this and binge some shows a little more. The house cleaning  and laundry can wait.

The days are long, but the years (and weeks) are too short.

Tessa is Three Months!

I celebrated turning three months in Las Vegas! (which is why Mom is a little late getting this out.)
I rocked my first flight, especially on the way home.
I even went on my first road trip to Aunt Rissa’s new house. It has been a busy travel month.
I smile constantly, showing off my cute dimples.
I am still a tiny peanut at just over 11 pounds (my doctor is a little concerned).
I coo and gurgle in the sweetest little voice.
I met and snuggled all my cousins for the annual Smith/Driscoll Christmas celebration.
I watch everything and do not want to miss out on anything. Those lights in Vegas are mesmerizing!
I so desperately want to stand and I strengthen my leg muscles everyday trying to.

Tessa is Two Months!

I grew to ten pounds, eight ounces and twenty-two and a half inches.
I smile and it brings happy tears to my momma's eyes.
I tried so hard to talk all month and finally coo-ed at the doctor during my check-up.
I spent the night at Grandma and Grandpa's for the first time.
I have epic range when I spit up -- Momma calls me the Exorcist baby.  Don't worry, the doctor gave me some medicine to help.
I enjoyed my first unofficial snow day.
I attended my first caucuses and met Momma's students. 
I had my first trip to Greenbriar with the Smith family.
I visited more of Momma's students and friends at school.
I love laying under my activity gym while kicking constantly.

Tessa is One Month!

And a busy month it has been!

I grew to 20 inches by my two-week check-up.
I was nine pounds and three ounces last week.
I had my first trip to the ER when I was two days old.  Don't worry, I was just trying to keep Mom and Dad on their toes.  It worked. 
I celebrated my first Christmas season and learned all about our family traditions.
I will adamantly tell you exactly what I want.
I am cold all the time.  I wear a onesie, fleece sleeper, swaddle, and swaddle blanket to bed.
I love Momma snuggles more than anything (especially when I am fussy).
I love listening to my sister sing (and she is a great helper to Mom!).
I lean way back when I am held so I can see everything.
I found the mobile on my swing and love watching it.

Life is Good: Reflections on 2019

A former colleague of mine nominated me for the "Life is Good" challenge on Facebook.  This one asks participants to post a photo that is meaningful to them without explanation.  10 photos.  10 days.

To be honest, I do love these challenges.  I prefer these pictures to flood my news feed than depressing news articles and creepy stalker advertisements.  However, I have commitment problems with these challenges.  For one, it's a vulnerable act to share these pieces of my life.  Each post -- whether a photo, announcement, or meme -- really is exposing a part of who you are.  And, two, the minute I miss a day, I feel like a failure. Then I just give up without finishing.

So this time, I'm using it as an invitation to reflect on 2019 - 10 good moments to celebrate this year.  If you look at my social media persona, I'm sure you assume this is an easy task for me. But of course, that's the magic of social media.  It masks the struggles.  The reality.

And you know what?  Maybe that's okay.  Maybe we need a spot to remind ourselves of the best versions of who we are. With that in mind, here are the top 15 everyday moments I want to hold onto from 2019 (because I couldn't pick just 10).

January 27th

January 30th

February 23rd

March 10th

April 5th

July 24th

July 26th

July 30th

August 14th

September 16th

November 16th

December 6th

December 8th

 December 15th

Worth the Wait

26 months trying to conceive
17 months infertility therapy
  6 intrauterine inseminations
  1 positive pregnancy test

Baby girl arrives in December.

International Women's Day: A Tribute

I looked around the room with my daughter, my sister, my mother, and my grandmother, and realized I am the least stubborn of all of these women.  And, man, is that saying a lot. 

Never once have any of these women let someone else tell them they can't do something.  In fact, each see it as a personal mission to prove them wrong.  (If you hear "Watch me" as a response, move aside.  Quickly.)

Each of them has a special place in their hearts for the innocence and magic of children.  They make each child feel as if there is nothing more important in the world than what that child is doing right now.  It's a no wonder I am a teacher, and my sister is a pediatric nurse.  

I am so honored Mila will know the strength and power of these women.  They will guide her to follow her intuition.  They will give the best hugs that envelop her in safety.  They will show her what unconditional love is.