1, 2, 3!

I'm swamped.  Like frantic, overwhelmed, never going to see the light again, swamped.  A swamped that only teachers understand at the end of the quarter and before Spring Break.

So, today, I offer this adorable video of my sweet amazing girl learning to count.  Every day she picks up on something new and impresses me.  My heart bursts with pride.

What I'm Reading: Unbroken

My Sports Lit class is reading Unbroken by Lauren Hillenbrand, and I'm reading it for the first time with them.  Of course, there is always a fear in assigning a book I haven't read.  But, there is also something scared about experiencing a book the first time with your students.  I am more a reader, like they are, than a teacher.  It allows us to connected and discuss more authentically.

As I was reading last night, Louie Zamperini was getting ready to go officially off to war.  Hillenbrand notes that the crew leaves Iowa in October of 1942.  This short simple sentence is a sea of descriptions caught me off guard.

This could have been my grandpa.

When I started to make parallels between what I knew of his stories and what was happening in the book, it was erie.  Besides the obvious Iowa connection, my mom confirmed Grandpa entered the war in 1942 when he was seventeen years old.  Grandpa fought in the Pacific Theater, like Zamperini.  I half expect Hillenbrand to mention Zamperini running into this young kid, Bud LaMasters, who ornery and caring and loyal.  I want to know if their lives every overlapped.  Is this book part of my history?

Whether they met or not, this story feels like it belongs to me, too.   The rich history and historical accounts with thorough research show me what my grandpa went through.  Now, I picture him with Zamperini and his crew as they face the conflicts of war.

Grandpa didn't share much with us about his experiences, and I don't blame him for that--though I would have treasured every story.  This book brought him back to me.

Because this is my first read through of the book, my students will get a different experience than if I was more familiar with it.  They will get my honest personal reaction and connection.  It may be emotional and mess, but more than anything, it will be authentic.

My Tribe

This weekend, I got to see my tribe.

This is a group of people who get it.  They get how exhausting this job is.  They get the demand of the essays to grade.  They get the unique layer being and English teacher adds to the education profession.

This group also challenges me, supports me, and encourages me.  They push me to try new things. They offer suggestions and guidance (and wine) when I'm stuck.  They make me believe I can do anything I want.

This weekend, I got to read with them.

I got to write with them.  

               

And I got to do it all with a good teacher friend and immerse her further into this community. 

This weekend reminded me I need to do more of this.  It's an effort to make time for these passions of mine, but it's a worthy effort.

After a few hours in their presence, I left rejuvenated, recharged, and refreshed.  It's perfect timing to take on the rest of my semester.

I love being a mom and a wife, but I also love being me, too.

Where You Lead, I Will Follow You

You walk over to me with your hand and voice welcoming me.  When I accept, you take me over to Daddy with the same greeting.  You make it really hard for us to say no.

Then, you lead us.  Sometimes around the island.  Sometimes to look out the front door.  Sometimes upstairs to play with your other toys.  Sometimes aimless around the backyard.  We usually don't know where you are going, but you always do.  But don't worry, we'll follow you.

More than anything, that's what I want you to always know:

Where you lead, I will follow
Anywhere that you tell me to
If you need, you need me to be with you
I will follow where you lead

I've been singing this song to you since you were born.  It's one of three or four in our nightly lullaby rotations.  (All the songs that I created memories with my mom, and now, I want the same for you.)

If I ever feel too tired or busy to go, I remind myself this stage is fleeting.  One day, you won't do this.  I plan to savor every moment you let me.

You're Welcome

This year at parent-teacher conference, I had more parents thank me than ever before.  Not the typically, polite "thank you" to end a conversation, but a true show of appreciation and gratitude.

A parent who appreciated my patience in helping her daughter who has fallen behind in class.

A parent who thanked me for my passion and energy in teaching his student.  Saying he wished he had a teacher like me when he was in school.

A parent who said all she hears about at home is how great "Nikki Smith" is everyday.  The feeling is mutual for her daughter.

I'm not sure why.   Maybe I have changed?  Maybe it's just a coincidence?  Maybe the current political climate?

No matter the reason, it is so appreciated.  More than you know.

That One Thing

That one thing you did yesterday is enough.

Yes, but --

I know, I know.  But that list is never going to be "done."

I know, but it was only ONE thing -- 

Right.  You did ONE thing for 2nd hour, and ONE thing for 3rd hour, and ONE thing for 5th hour and...

But, I didn't grade anything from my pile --

No, you didn't.  But you did today.  You got through two classes worth.

I did nothing but sit in front of the television last night --

While you wrote a six page grant application.

I couldn't get myself up to run this morning -- 

Because you are actually, physically wearing yourself out.  You're going to get sick if you don't take care of yourself.

But I still haven't planned for my new unit that starts on Friday -- 

And you will.  It will get done.

How do you know? 

Because it always does.

But -- 

Seriously.  Just stop.

Thanks page-a-day. 

The Missing Slice

The "Slice of Life" challenge so pointedly reminds me about the missing slice of my life: writing.  

I know the advantages for me, my students, my mind.

I know I always feel better emotionally, physically, and spiritually after writing.

I know I love to look back on my writing and reflect on the person I was through the voice.  

I know it's who I am. 

But, I haven't done it.  

I haven't journaled my thoughts, feelings or memories.

I haven't blogged Mila's many milestones. 

I haven't shared the amazing happenings with my students' learning.  

I could provide excuses.  Or, I could just write.  

So, before I delete this post and decide not to commit (because that would be easier) I'm going to hit "Publish" and see what happens.